On my way

I am sneaking out now while he has his eyes shut – Albert not Elvis. 

Dinner

Albert please cook your own dinner and I can go out early – Albert can you hear me?

 

Cat mail

In the post this morning was a postcard addressed to Elvis from Basil, there was a picture of a Dutch hen on it. 

Much to Albert’s dismay I read the card to Elvis – no response though.

 

 

                                                                                        

Problems

I am out with my old school friends tonight and I need to ask them what I should do with Albert – he keeps saying ‘why’ to every question I ask him.  My children did this when they were three – they will know what the solution is.

Veronica is at work so I have to report back to her.

 

 

Cockles, whelks and gin

I was invited on a pensioners’ trip to the seaside and it all started off quietly but ended up very competitive on the dodgem cars. I wish Veronica had been with me, I would have let her drive.

I returned home early to Albert having left the eighty year olds drinking whisky in the nearest pub.

                                                                                        

Stop that Veronica

Would you believe that Veronica and I had a letter each printed in the local paper, yes local to the city down the road, and up yonder?  Veronica’s letter was bigger than mine.

We were complaining about museum charges which are to be made to save the council money – we have several suggestions to save them money; we are available for advice any day; except an adventure day.

 

Short stay

Albert and I were invited to a barbeque yesterday, we arrived at three o’clock and Albert stressed that we were not to stay long.

We left at midnight and Albert was not ready to leave – poor Elvis was sat on the doorstep when we got home.

 

A bit of bother

I tried to wave at Robert today, he is a friend of Violet Rose and Albert would not let me.   I shall go out on my own tomorrow and wave at Robert!

 

 

 

Not cruel

A message for Ethel Suet from Saltash.  

I am not being cruel to Elvis he likes the allotment, he likes the shade and the peace and he likes me.

 

 

Horoscopes

My horoscope reading today stated I should not sit in a draught or get wet.  I will sit in the allotment shed with Elvis and read a book ……….

Albert and I are slimming so I left him some lettuce for lunch.

 

 

 

Adventures without trying

Veronica and I were walking in a cemetery looking for local names when I pointed out a gravestone – I know I should not have touched it, I should not have gently outlined the date which was 1910.  It was not my fault that the top fell off the grave and landed on my foot; it was very old.

After this experience I was sorely tempted to ring the bell in the church but Veronica would not let me.

Still laughing  ……and then there was the dog that recognised me.

No pink wine

Albert and I took Lonnie and Gwendolyn to a brewery yesterday and then visited Veronica without wine.

Our visitors were fun but  have left now – just typing this drinking a cup of tea and I shall be on my way to collect Veronica for our day out.

 

Visitors

Lonnie and Gwendolyn are visiting us tomorrow from New Zealand – I must dust and bake a cake. 

As Lonnie is a journalist should I take him to a football match for reporting advice or let him write my blog for a while.

Gwendolyn is a genealogist and wool scientist, what on earth shall I do with her?

I know we will visit Veronica with a bottle of pink wine.

 

Rake and spade

Christelina is again questioning the location and existence of my allotment, where does she think I am going when I leave home with gardening equipment? 

Elvis knows my destination.

 

 

Next week's adventure

We, Veronica and I have decided to do something different; we are having a day out on Tuesday and I am driving and she can drink and then in August we shall reverse roles.

We are hoping to have a meal and a healthy fitness walk too ……. depends on weather.

Destination: Northumberland July and Humberside in August but subject to change at short notice.

 

wrong message

I was to meet Veronica today for lunch however she sent me a text saying Emilio was sick; I obviously expressed concern and wished her well.

I then received a telephone call from a laughing Veronica telling me it was her sofa that was sick and she was waiting for the repair men!

I must stop speed reading …………….

No lunch then.

 

 

Busy day

I was on the bus early today to complain to the council about the proposed planning permission, for the rabbit viewing extension next door; it makes a change to type grammatically correct letters.  However I did mention in one objection letter that if all else fails I will be writing to David Cameron and Pope Francis for back up?

I am out this evening with a fellow writer, I did not mention to Albert that the writer is a man and shall change his name from Claude to Claudette.

 

 

Carpet story

There was a change of plan last week and we did not look after Carpet – let me tell you the story of his name.

The owners of the said dog were saving up for a new carpet for their house and the husband came home one day with a homeless dog – so the new carpet was a dog.

Oh yes, we did not look after Carpet because we were sent to Durham to look after a house and a lamb; we are very special house sitters

 

Screaming

I wondered why my watering can would not work and tipped out the contents on my onions – I did not mean to scream but I did; Elvis looked alarmed and Albert did not hear me.  Why did I scream it was because there was a dead frog in my watering can.

Oh Veronica where are you, I need a meeting with a pie and a glass of wine!

 

Hiding

To enable me to write my love story I need to keep out of Albert’s sight but I can still hear him!

Leaving home with my lap top I know a café that serves wine.

 

 

 

A competition

I found a competition for a Mills and Boon book deal, where you have to type the first chapter

 

Suddenly Posy Slagyford found she was without a job and a man and decided to pack up her totector boots and catch a bus to ………

 

I may be a while in getting back to you and where is my pal Veronica, she could help me over a bottle of pink wine.

 

 

Returned

I am back but need to do my washing first before I tell you a few tales – I may even tell you about Olive.

 

A few days

Just nipping out with Albert to look after a dog named Carpet in a village up a hill near Mablethorpe. 

See you on Friday.

Elvis has returned

I did not want to worry you but Elvis has been missing for two days; he just sauntered into the kitchen looking tired.  I will never know where he spent the last two days.

I need a rest

I have given up going out for a while as I have been socializing since last Wednesday, however if Veronica was to telephone me …..