Today's Saint

Today is St Ignatius of Loyola’s day but personally I liked the sound of Saint Peter Chrysologus which was yesterday’s Saint – he believed you should not bore people.

Should I make my blog brief and to the point – I shall ask Veronica.  That reminds me, where is she?

I know where Albert is!

A day out

Albert and I had a day out in the countryside and by mistake became involved in a car rally – we were not winning.  Albert was not amused and decided to turn around which was worse because when we were in the middle we had not noticed that there were hundreds of them. 

We were eventually saved by a herd of cows which enabled us to take a short cut through a farm yard.

It was funny …….

 

 

My pal

I missed a day out with Veronica yesterday – I will make it up to her.

 

 

Phillip

I was going to tell you about Phillip a friend and not mention Albert for at least a week.  This decision was changed yesterday when Albert and I went out for the day and something funny happened.

 I am just going to decant my red wine into a blackcurrant juice bottle so Albert will not notice; I will tell you the story after tea.

 

 

Problem solved

The rabbit problem, I told one of the children belonging to the clarinet player that Elvis would eat the rabbit if he caught him in his garden.

I was slightly sorry that Flintoff (the child) cried but have since noticed that my salad patch is thriving.

 Thank you Elvis.

Rabbit again

Oh yes the rabbit, which belongs to the clarinet player next door - he lets the valuable rabbit out before bedtime and the rabbit likes my lettuces.  Should I sue him or kidnap the rabbit?

I am going out again with Violet Rose for dinner and a gin and tonic; we went out for the afternoon too which I shall tell you about later if you are lucky.

Whilst we are out we shall discuss this rabbit issue.

Rabbit

Did I tell you about the rabbit next door, it is a rare lilac rabbit and it has been eating my lettuce.

Tell you later I am escaping because Albert is out for the day.

Beans and snails

Something is eating my beans and I have snails in my cabbages – this may call for a moonlight visit with my organic water gun.

learning to write

I am going on a writing course in Yorkshire, I shall tell you later what Albert said.

 Oh, not yet in August.

Not August

Veronica and I are meeting up for a whole day in September because we are booked on a bus trip.

 Albert will need to get his own breakfast and lunch ………

Another lunch

I met up for lunch with my pal Veronica on Monday; much to Albert’s disgust, he cannot understand why I need to go out at all.

 

We were joined for lunch by many others – I wonder if it is because we are popular ………

 

Back home and Albert has a bad knee, I gave him a painkiller and set off for the allotment with Elvis; Albert is invited to join us but declined.

 

 

Travelling

Albert says he is not travelling anymore, just in case I have hidden his passport and ordered a new travel brochure.

A gazebo

We bought a gazebo ‘for summer’ and Elvis thinks it is his – he refuses to leave and will not come to the allotment with me.

 I could take the gazebo to the allotment?

Not missing

Veronica contacted me and stated that it was me that was missing not her?

 

Eunice and Veronica

Albert has shown an interest in Eunice and Veronica, should I worry?

Telephone calls

Albert has deleted many numbers from our personal telephone book because he said they never call us, how does he know?

 What am I to do if I need to call my Bank Manager Robin, my Yoga Teacher Velda or any Tom, Dick or Harry that are now permanently deleted?

 Any ideas what I should do with him?

A fly

A friend was trying to catch a fly and fell off the bed breaking his wrist – tomorrow is his birthday and I have bought a fly swatter with a 2 ft handle.

 Veronica is missing again.

 

 

Albert

Veronica said that I am ungrateful and should treasure the washing powder.

 Why?

A present

Did I tell you what Albert bought for my birthday?

 He bought me champagne and a box of Persil –

 the washing powder was on special offer.

Behind a shrub

I saw Veronica today when I was on the way to meet another famous writer from Derby – she saw me walking down the street and jumped out from behind a shrub laughing at me!

Personally I prefer to meet up with my friend when arranged and not when she is trying to frighten me – she did invite me for a drink but I did not have time.

What was she doing behind the shrub – she can tell me in two weeks time as we have a rendezvous for a coffee.

A story

I told the pan scrubber story today; you must remember it – the lady who travelled to the doctors with the pan scrubber attached to her woolly hat!

A wall

Albert built a wall for me (a small one) and I do not like it; should I tell him now or next week.

I will ring Veronica she will have thoughts on the wall.

Body lotion

I treated myself to a famous make of body lotion and was looking forward to using it; I took the top off and went to for a shower and when I returned completely forgot about it.   

Gist of the story is that I sat on the body lotion which in seconds was part of my bedroom décor, up the wall, large portion on the duvet and my bedside lamp.

 Buying cheap stuff in future.

Men in lycra

What fun, I left my bike at home and travelled by train to York to watch the Tour De France; I am tired now.

My Pushbike

I am ready, dusted off my pushbike and leaving Albert to look after himself again. 

 No I am not taking Elvis; he would slide off the seat.

 

Where am I going, tour de France of course because it is in Yorkshire.

 

Will ring Veronica later.

Gin and Tonic

A message to Bradley of Rhyl (in Wales to those who do not know) it was English gin, and I did in fact only have one.                                                        .

A day at the seaside

I am feeling a bit frail today after my day at Bridlington; now I wonder whether it was the fish and chips or the double gin and tonics?

 Never mind who I was with.

 

My friend Veronica

I do not think Veronica likes me anymore because she went to the pictures on her own.

 

James Martin

After all these years I have learnt how to make garlic butter, thanks James; I now put my pans in the oven too

 Can I come for supper?

 

Who is he, a proper 'Yorkshire Chef'.

Is it true?

Christelina from Germany does not believe I have an allotment – come on over I shall give you a tour along with Elvis of course.

My pink wellies

Back from Glastonbury, I saw Dolly Parton but lost my pink wellies!

 After I clean the sink I need a rest – Albert is missing?